How I hate S.B. and their fax process

The year is 2007. Yet I find myself doing the strangest things. I
thought I had put these things behind me. I thought we had solved
these problems and progressed forward. But it appears not all of us
have caught on.

In particular, S.B., the initials of a financial company, is in the
worst state of denial. I've had a problem with S.B. for several years
now. I have not been able to get them to do something as simple as
changing my address!

When I moved apartments I went to each financial web site that I hold
an account with and was able to change my address within a matter of
minutes. With S.B. it is taking 2 years now and counting. The reason
is quite simple once you hear their process to change your address.

First you need to dial their 1-800 phone number within the hours of 8
am and 8 pm EST. Once you get a representative on the line you have to
verify your identity. Typically this is done by stating your social
security number and address. Now we all know that your SSN should be
used in the rarest occasion to prevent identity theft, and not ever as
an account identity. The second issue is you have to tell them the
address they have on record. Problem is, you've probably forgotten it
since you've moved.

Once you've provided all this information they will ask for your email
address. Even though they do have this on file and it unlike your
mailing address has not changed. They ask this to email the change of
address form. Alternatively you can provide them a fax number if you
desire.

A few minutes later you should recieve their email. Instead of sending
something logical like a PDF or Word document they send a TIF image of
the document scanned. I kid you not! They scanned a printed form and
sent it to you as an image.

So great... Print that sucker out! Fill out the form and fax it back.
Right?

Right. But! Here comes the real tricky part. The data you enter has to
match *EXACTLY* what they have on record. I learned this the hard way
as there is no warning other than it fitting their insane processes in
general.

My form has been rejected for the following reasons.

• Using the stock ticker instead of the full company name
• Leaving out my middle name (though the form only asks for first and
last name)
• Providing my middle name instead of my middle initial
• Not providing my old home phone number
• Not providing my old work fax number

And only god knows what else! You have to call back a week after
you've faxed it and hope you get someone to explain what happened.

This shit is barely excusable in 1997. It is just pathetic in 2007. In
the past decade their competitors have moved beyond basic web forms.
Some are even going into web 2.0 and all kinds of other buzz words.
Most have everything so automated it is hard to locate a phone number
to call on their web site, let alone a fax number.

Someday I will get my address changed. Next I will figure out how to
sell all my stock via their fax system. Then I can request the form to
cancel my account. I will truly be done with the 1980's.

Lee
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Sent from my iPhone